The creative process...

Ah, so this might explain why I can't seem to get ahead with the books I'm working on!

HAPPY MONDAY! XOXO

Calling all Connecticut Preppies!!!

Ok, so that's a tad redundant! But we have BIG news... The Ultimate Preppy, author of TOPH (The Official Preppy Handbook) and True Prep will be at J.mcLaughlin's Westport store for a book signing on Thursday, March 10th from 5 - 8 pm!

Yes, that's right! So come on by... I'll be there and hope to see you all!

XOXO

Friday Happiness

My days of late seem long and never-ending. I am up at 6:00 prepping lunch or breakfast or dinner. And doing laundry. And getting the kids ready for school and myself ready for work or meetings and work or gym and meetings and work. I'm home by 7:00 and have to finish getting dinner ready and if I have not already started I have to throw something together. Fast. And I really want to change and my feet hurt but I must tend to the children. The dishwasher needs to be emptied and the dinner dishes need to be done. My feet still hurt. I still have not taken off my shoes or my work clothes. I want a bath. A nice long hot bath with a glass of wine and some bubbles. But I have to fold the laundry that's in the dryer. I have to toss the darks in to the dryer and the whites into the wash. I need to make sure homework has been done. It's now 8:00PM. I am beat. Exhausted. I really want to stick Alexander in front of the TV. But I read to him instead. And I extend his bedtime by a half an hour so I can cuddle with him after I read to him... while I check emails and story ideas on my laptop. Often, these days, I fall asleep long before my wine glass is emptied.  But it's all good. Good things are coming my way. More to come soon. May we all remember there's good even when it seems that calamity surrounds us!

I hope you all have a wonderful Friday!

Are you left or right brained?

I think this ad is genius!

I am right brained, absolutely! What about you?

Twelve Year Old Wisdom

We arrived home from Newport early on Sunday so that Christopher could go to a hockey game with his father. That left me to find something to do with a 12 year old and a 5 year old. The seven year age gap often proves challenging. While no one could agree on anything I suggested that we head out to grab something to eat. It was 2:00 and we had no food in the house. I mentioned all these kid friendly restaurants in town where menus had healthier options. Suddenly Alexander came up with the fabulous (insert eye roll please!) idea of going to McDonald's. I was trying to keep away from the junk, but he was insistent and I really didn't want to battle and so Rebecca shrugged her shoulders and gave me an "I don't really care. It's OK with me." kind of look. Then he announced that he wanted to go to the one with the indoor play space. I felt my body instantly being attacked by Sick Germs! Ewwww! I really hate those places. I mean really hate them.

But we were having such a nice weekend and I really didn't want to ruin it for him. And I have no idea what on earth got into me. So we went. To McDonald's. With the indoor play space. Ick!

Of course as soon as we get there I notice that Alexander has bare feet under his Merrells, never mind that I had asked him three times to put socks on. Rules clearly state that socks must be worn. Those places are gross enough. No way I am letting him play in there in bare feet!

We ordered our food -- two cheeseburger Happy Meals and a grilled chicken sandwich and headed over to the play space which was remarkably clean and remarkably un-crowded despite the fact that it was about 15 degrees outside and a long holiday weekend. The few children in there were about the same size as Alexander.

Alexander, didn't really want the cheeseburger, he told me. It was all about the toy! Of course it was! He ate his cheeseburger and wanted to dash off with the other children. Of course he did! But we had the problem with the socks. Or lack thereof. But I, being the good Momma, took my socks off and gave them to my 5 year old so that he could run around and have fun. A dad sitting in the booth behind me saw what we were doing and laughed.

Alexander took off and within seconds had about 5 new friends. Rebecca and I watched as the children played. As she watched she made a very astute observation. "Have you ever noticed that children always make friends and that they are happy to play together? Then they get older and they don't do that anymore." She thought about it some and then asked "I wonder what happens that we stop wanting to talk to  everyone we meet?"

While it wold be a lovely thing if we all could start conversations with random people and become fast friends,   I think what Rebecca is learning in life and by this observation, is that she has obvious interests and likes and she is defining her personality and her passions. These will, of course, change many, many times over the years but she is growing up and well on the path to the wonderful person I know she will become one day. A true and selfless sign was that she even agreed to bring Alexander into the germ-filled cesspool to begin with instead of having a fit that there was nothing for her to do there. As one child grows up before my eyes, my youngest is also creating memories for his future.

For the rest of his days he'll say to me "Momma, remember you took me to that McDonald's that had that playground inside of it? It was so much fun! Can we go again one day? Please?!" To which I will answer,"Maybe." I will answer this partly because I am not sure that we ever will go to one again and partially because Maybe is easier to say than No. Sometimes it's best not to be like a child and say what exactly is on your mind!

An unexpected gift - Time with my boys and a gorgeous day

I've been working weekends and crazy hours which has severely limited my time with my kids. While I love work I truly hate that I haven't seen much of my children. Like most working parents I rush them off to school and then don't see them again until dinnertime. I have a couple of hours with them in the evening but I'm usually fried, as are they. It's hardly quality time. Working weekends is challenging as well. And perhaps that's the hardest of all. We do what we have to to make things work and provide for our families but sometimes it seems that no one is really coming out ahead. The children are missing their mother. The mother is missing her children and all for a few dollars... I've other things in the pipeline and I am keeping my fingers crossed... I'll keep you posted... Meantime, I was able to spend a few days with my kids. We all had a long weekend, took advantage of an unexpected warm day by going to the beach, went to Newport and are now home to celebrate my older boy's 10th Birthday. Happy Birthday Sweet Christopher! I suppose, had I not been working so many days and late hours I would have taken this time, this gift, with my children for granted. I am sure that I would have. But because this gift is so rare for me these days, we filled our days and enjoyed every minute of it!

Before we know it we'll be here in bathing suits, eating ice cream cones! 

Looking for shells is always fun!

A piece of driftwood and Alexander has become Captain of a giant sailing vessel!

Why does everything have to be a weapon with him?

Rebecca used to think these were Angel's Wings!

A piece of driftwood -- love the pattern of the disintegrating bark

Driftwood

Long Island Sound

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Perhaps this gives new definition to the term sun worshiper! 

Off with his shoes!

Christopher's shadow

 

Me and my shadow!

A little tailgate party!

Off to clean the car!

At the car wash!

I think this might be the only time my boys like to get clean!

The boys never tire of this!

 

Almost done!

What a fun ride that was!

Newport was fun but cold! We were supposed to go on a Harbor Seal Cruise but it was cancelled due to the high winds. We found others things to keep us busy and warm. Along the way Rebecca wanted me to take her to St. George's School as she has it in her mind that she may want to go here for high school. It's a fabulous and beautiful school. Keep up the good grades and she just might have a chance!

View from the front of the campus down to Newport's Second Beach

 When we got back to Moo and Popsy's we had an early Birthday celebration for nearly 10 year old!

And now I must be off as I have a Birthday breakfast to create and some presents to wrap!

Bow-dacious!

According to The Wall Street Journal  orange is the color of the Spring season. So agrees New York Magazine.  They must have read my post a year ago. I wrote about my love of orange here. You had no idea I was such a trend-setter, did you?!

Orange. I'm mad about it. It excites me. It energizes me. Bows (if done right) are marvelous.

This dress is sublime. Marvelous. It's an Isaac Mizrahi. I love him for it. This dress was made for me!

The kids and I are off to Newport for the weekend. We have a bunch of exciting things on our list including a Harbor Seal tour! The weather is supposed to be beautiful and we all need to get away and spend some time in the nearly-Spring air! I'll have my cameras with me and promise you loads of pictures when we return!

saying thank you

courtesy, elum

As soon as my children could say Mama or Dada they learned the importance of saying thank you. For months I trained my toddlers the power of the two small words. Anytime they wanted something I would hand them their requested item while saying "thank you" and having them repeat after me. As they grew older they knew to say please and thank you on their own. Often they would need gentle reminders. I still tell my 9 year old to thank his hosts every time he goes over to a friend's house. My 5 year old still needs frequent reminders and my 12 year old has the art of the thank you mastered.

My grandmother, La Jolie Grandmere, respected everyone equally, and the grocery bagger would be treated with the same respect as the Queen. She understood and valued the importance of this. And it rubbed off on me at a young age.  I want my children to understand that there are all kinds of people in life and that they should all be treated well. I think we have this pretty well covered as well. My children know to thank anybody who helps them throughout their day.

It dawned on me, the other day, as a woman complimented something I was wearing, that I am horrible with compliments -- not giving them, but accepting them.

I love to compliment people. Especially now that I have my hand in retail. We, women, are a very insecure bunch. Whether short or tall, petite or large, there is not a woman who is not hung-up about something... her breasts are too small, her middle is too large, her thighs are too "thundery." I love to let a woman know that she is beautiful. I love to see her walk out of the store with her new purchase and a little bit of a skip to her walk and a smile on face that was not there when she walked in through the front door. Tell someone they look lovely and their whole demeanor changes. Compliments are wonderful, powerful things.

And I am terrible at accepting them! I always have been and I am not too sure why. But if I'm complimented on a pair of shoes or the way an article of clothing looks on me I'll shrug my shoulders and say something stupid like "oh, this old sweater?" or "I got these shoes at Marshall's..." Why do I do this? I don't know. I suppose on some level the compliment must make me uncomfortable... so from here on in, if someone compliments me I will simply say "Thank you!" -- and then maybe add the bit about the Cole Haan flats being on a fabulous sale at Marshalls!

Do compliments make you uncomfortable? Or is it only me!

sometimes the best laid plans are those with no plans...

Happy Valentine's Day!

May your day be filled with flowers and chocolates. Lots and lots of chocolates!

isn't it the truth?!

Happy Sunday!

take a chance with me...

I was chatting with a dear old friend yesterday. We were talking about life in our early 40s vs life in our 20s and 30s. I was eager to say that while I loved my 20s I would never want to go back. I loved the freedom I had to come and go. I loved the fact that I had very few real responsibilities as I was not yet married and had no family to take care of. I loved the fact that I was able to travel and see new places and meet new people. I learned a lot in my twenties and I grew a lot in my twenties. I certainly had a lot of fun in my twenties. But what I did not know then, that I know now, was that I was still young and inexperienced and fairly insecure. I had many jobs in my twenties that I hoped would all pave the way to a successful writing career. One such job was working for a local best-selling author. I assisted her with her manuscript from conception to publication. And it was a most amazing experience. The greatest bit of advice she ever gave me was to wait until I was older to start writing books. "You need to live and experience life to write about it. You cannot write about what you do not know." Those words have remained with me, sometimes dormant, other times not, in the back of my head.

I got married just days after I turned 30 and spent that decade raising my family. Sometimes I wrote and sometimes I didn't. I tried to find other venues to be creative, but mostly I was focused on my family. Being a mother is a full time job. Yes, it is a career of sorts. After all, how you influence and raise your children will affect them and you for the rest of your lives. My 30s were all a very important part of my growing process. While I did not have the freedom and lack of responsibility that I had the decade before, I had one, then two, then three little beings who would teach me things and help me to see the world in a whole new light. What an amazing gift that is! Also, in my 30s, my feelings of self worth and my self confidence started to soar. More great gifts. As I gained in years I also gained in life lessons and experiences. I learned to be patient. I started to sweat the small stuff less and less. (I'm still working on that now!)

When I turned 40 I realized things I had never before realized. I started to hear what my friends were really telling me. I was smart and funny and creative and talented. I never claimed to be Supermom and know that I am not (despite what some friends say and think). Most importantly I have become strong and self confident and finally know that I have what it takes to thrive and succeed. I am working towards new goals -- same old dreams -- and know that this will not happen over night... it may take a year or two. But with the patience that  is slowly becoming part of who I am, I know that's Ok. Most importantly, I am learning not to be afraid to take chances and afraid of failure. Failures are often the stepping stones to success. I tell my children this all the time and now it is time to keep reminding myself.

As a young child I was not an early walker and often I would simply avoid trying new things because of fear of failure. I see this so clearly in my youngest. This has been an issue my entire life. But no longer...

Life is about trying and learning and taking chances and living without regrets. And if I don't get to where I want to the first time I find another way to get there. But I will get there!

So to all my 20 and 30 year old friends... have faith, have fun, live, learn, be patient, be strong, make mistakes, and have a little faith in yourself. You can do it!

Little girls will always be little girls!

I have nothing terribly exciting to report or blog about and don't want to bore you all with the drab and mundane -- the laundry that needs to be folded and sorted... the dishwasher that needs to be run (then emptied)... the floors that need to be mopped... the homework... the errands and the general everyday tasks that make up our life...

But when I was poking through Pinterest this morning this picture made me smile. I had a great big laugh. Did you not do this too when you were little girls?

Have a great Tuesday!

courtesy, Fotos de inspire me 

Monday Monday

I love Mondays. I didn't used to. In fact, it's really only quite recently that I have come to love this day. To most of us it means the start of a new work week after the weekend... To most of us it means a new set of worries and pressures and stresses and not enough time. This is how I used think as well. I have changed my way of thinking, in part, due to my kids. I can't have them dreading their Mondays already with a lifetime of Mondays ahead of them. Instead of focusing on the negative we turn to the positive and look at all the good things in store. And when nothing seems that exciting on the horizon we need to create something exciting. We need to have something to look forward to. N'est ce pas? Isn't your day always more exciting when there is a Birthday party to attend or a night out on the town with good friends or that boy you've been pining for who takes the same elevator you do in the morning?

So it's Monday and the possibilities of all the greatness that can come from this week are endless. In addition to our regular and mundane and never-ending To Do Lists, let's all create a Do Something New List... something we haven't done before... or something we haven't done in a long time. Call up a friend and tell them you love them or miss them or that you think they are beautiful. Brighten up someone else's Monday too! Bring some flowers home after work and add a touch of Springtime to your home. Write a long letter to someone you care about... someone you haven't seen in a long time. Tackle a new project that you have wanted to but has always seemed a bit daunting. Try a new recipe. Bake a cake for Monday, just because. Put yourself out there... shiny new heel in front of shiny new heel... baby steps if you must!

courtesy, Smitten Kitchen

courtesy, Crave Photography

How are you going to celebrate Monday?

Literary Inspirations... and darned good marketing!

My life is often inspired and influenced by the written word. Books are my passion. Imagine my delight when I found the following items!

I'll bring one of these chairs to the beach with me... unsure as to whether I want The Garden Party or The Horizontal Man!

Of course the warm sun will leave me thirsty. I'll keep my Jack Palmer nice and cool in this thermos. Isn't this simply the cleverest?!

I haven't yet switched over to to an e-reader, but this Nook cover by Kate Spade will be in my beach bag when I do!

The Giving Tree is one of my most favorite children's books. I love this iPad cover. It too will be in my beach bag!

After a long day at the beach, soaking up the sun's rays... diving into the surf to cool off, I'll need a cup of coffee to give me an end of afternoon energy boost. I like Sweet Danger myself!

A literary lover's stairway to heaven!

These will certainly strike up a conversation!

These Scrabble pillows are darling! I'll rest my head on them at the end of the day after all the sun and salt and sunscreen has been showered off!

And when I am done with my good books I'll use this quotable packing tape and send them off to you!

What a great way to leave sweet little messages for the kids to find!