Seasons of love...

It's 7:03 as I sit down to write this, the last post of 2010. Alexander is sleeping peacefully next to me. In his small arms he has managed to fit 2 teddy bears, a bunny rabbit, and a dalmatian. The television is on and the Today Show is about to run a recap of all the moments, great and small, of this past year. I've done the same myself. I was inspired by the words in the song you hear playing in the background. It is currently Alexander's favorite. How do you measure a year? It has a been an introspective year for me. It has been a year of sadness that has, I know, affected my parenting. While I try as hard as I can to be the best parent I can be, I can't help but think that my children my children had less than stellar years as well. What do they see when they look back? How do they measure a year? This past year?

Outside the sky is a magnificent hue of violets and pinks. Stunning. Mesmerizing. The trees, snow and few remaining leaves have taken on various shades of these colors as well. A beautiful way to capture the final morning of 2010. I have a cappuccino on the bed stand to the left of me, along with my iPhone, glasses and the latest book I am reading -- Barbara Kingsolver's Animal, Vegetable, Miracle. The author describes the time when she uprooted her family to the Appalachia region where they would start a farm and learn how to live off of the earth. We have lost our roots to the earth and here she shows and teaches us how history, to some degree has caused us to be a sugar-consuming, fast food nation. She documents her year with her family as they set out to do something vastly unfamiliar to them. With intelligence, wit and humor a fabulous and informative memoir was born.

I've been reading mostly memoirs this past year. I think this started mostly because I was writing about La Jolie Grandmere and me and trying to find my own voice, I was studying how others wrote as well. I became a huge fan of Ruth Reichl and her food memoirs. Marjorie Hart's Summer at Tiffany's seem to hit a chord as she of the same generation as La Jolie Grandmere. I have just finished Katrina Kennison's The Gift of an Ordinary Day where the author at midlife with one son about to enter college, examines her life and discovers the very thing she has been waiting for has already happened. Another fabulous read.

I am happy to bid 2010 farewell. If I could I would sweep most of its pieces under the carpet but I cannot. If I could I would sleep away today but I cannot. I have much faith and hope for the new year. But, yet, I don't feel like celebrating. There will be celebrations and triumphs, like any other year, and like any other year there will be hurt, heartbreak and loss. That part I cannot bear...

As you know, if you are a regular reader, I am definitely a glass half full kind of girl. And with that I must look at the positives of this past year. I have taken back myself. What that means, is that over the years of parenting and looking out for everyone else, I lost a sense of myself and my dreams and goals. While they always loomed in the back of my head, I felt it was my duty to put my family first. This year I decided that I ought to come first as well. My New Year's Resolution last year was to get myself to the doctors (that never happened!) and to get back to being healthy. And that I did. I lost the 20 pounds that never came off after my youngest was born. I started working out daily and taking care of me. I started to re-think about my dreams and goals and desires for the future. I started to act upon them. I still work out several times a week. It's made me a better person all around. (And the 5 pounds that mysteriously have found their way back since summer will disappear after all this good holiday food does.. tomorrow!) I have a vision for my career and my success. For this I have to thank my grandmother, La Jolie Grandmere. As I sat and retyped her stories and added my own, I became overwhelmed by her strength and determination to make things happen in her life and knew that she would never have lived an unhappy life. I continue to strive for my goals and have made a vow to myself to never give up.

I bring these strengths and accomplishments and determinations with me in to the New Year. My goal this year is to continue the work I started last year and to create times and memories and moments that will make us all smile.My goal is also to create fabulous memories for my children. For I know that before I know it, I'll blink my eyes, and they will be out of my life and leading their own. I am at a perfect place. My children are old enough that I can live my own life and young enough that they are still fully a part of mine. My intent and goal is to savor every minute of this perfect place.

And if any of you happen to know of any publishers or agents send them this way! :)

I wish you all a wonderfully happy, healthy and prosperous New Year!

Out of the mouths of babes...

A couple of weeks ago I took the kids to a nice Japanese restaurant. They love to watch the chefs cook and do their magic on the hibachi. We sat back and enjoyed the show. I let the kids indulge in these special Japanese sodas (that taste like Sprite) that come in small glass bottles with marbles at the top. You need to pop the marble to be able to get the beverage. These fascinating treats cost me $4 a pop! (I told the children these were special treats and not to expect them every time we eat there. Nevermind my $8 glass of wine that I will not give up!) The children were very well behaved and ate well. It was a picture perfect night and I thoroughly enjoyed my time with them which had been scarce due to my crazy hours at work over the Christmas week. But, nothing is ever uneventful at The Entertaining House. There's always someone or something amiss!

At the Japanese restaurant it happened to be Alexander. He stuck his middle finger up and started waving it all around. He had no idea he was doing anything wrong until Rebecca quietly told him not to do that. And then she burst into fits of giggles... followed by Christopher and yes, me. You see, when you tell Alexander not to do something it is pretty much guaranteed that he will do exactly what you want him not to. It is also very hard to discipline your child when tears from hysterical laughter are streaming down your cheeks. Pretty soon everyone caught on to him and everyone started giggling along... thank goodness!

In the car on the way home we simply said to Alexander that he should never raise that finger in public. Rebecca explained that it meant something really bad and really inappropriate. He seemed to get it and the topic was dropped.

Until today.

I had the perfect day planned.

I was going to hit the gym briefly while Rebecca would watch the boys. I would then come home and we would all go to Alexander's Occupational Therapy session together. From there we would head out to lunch, then to paint some pottery, then the grocery store, home to put the groceries away and then back out to go sledding....

On the way to lunch from OT Alexander shouted out of the back seat.

"Momma!"
"Yes, Alexander."
"I know what the middle finger means!"
"What does it mean, Alexander?"
"It means FUCK!"

Had I been drinking a glass of wine, I surely would have spit it out to California!

Here's to good friends... tonight is kind of special...

Do you remember that old (some of you are too young) jingle from the Lowenbrau commercial? It can still be found on YouTube. I used to sing it all the time and I couldn't have been more than 10 years old! Well, yesterday I wanted to sing it again!

A major snowstorm turned blizzard was predicted. I headed out to run some errands early yesterday morning. The grocery store and the liquor store were on my hit list. And then it dawned on me, while I was out and about and while big, fat, white flakes started dancing in the sky, that it was Sunday. And in Connecticut the sales of liquor (including beer and wine) is prohibited. This dates back to the blue laws. In my opinion this is the most ridiculous thing. It nearly sent me driving to New York to pick up a bottle of wine. (I am about 30 minutes from the New York border so the thought is not as crazy as you might think!)

Our liquor cabinet is not empty... we have gins, rums, vodka as well as in the freezer. But no wine which I prefer. It's not loaded with calories and I can still function and parent after enjoying a glass.

I got home and posted the following as my Facebook status:

Of course this post generated a million comments including one from Tickled Pink and Green saying she thought I would have been more like Meg Ryan in When a Man Loves a Woman and keep a bottle tucked away here and there. Not a bad idea... one I really ought to consider! It also generated a comment from a neighbor, a wonderful friend, also a pilates partner who understands the importance of a good bottle of wine. She told me she would be happy to stop by and drop off a bottle. At that point I had found a nice bottle of Port and figured I would sip on that later in the afternoon.

But I hopped back on to Facebook to see the following message. "Check your mailbox!" So I did. And yes, I naturally brought the camera with me.

This is what I found!

See, I really do have the most amazing friends. How lucky and blessed am I!? (Yes, some of you have inquired... this is Hermes, Beth Dunn's bff. How lucky it was that Beth discovered that we were neighbors!)

Outside the snow is blowing, the winds are howling and it's truly a winter wonderland out there. Our driveway has been plowed but I'm pretty sure that I won't be going anywhere for a while. There is a good foot to foot and a half out there already and it's still coming down! I'm so very happy for this bottle of wonderful wine!

it's a wrap...

 

Thoughtful son...

The stockings were hung by the chimney with care...

My little helper helps to set up the reindeer food...

Santa's treats are ready, as are the reindeers!

A slice of eggnog pound cake, 2 decadent After Eight brownies and a clementine...

 

 
We decided to leave the reindeer food over by the fire...

Santa... it wouldn't be Christmas without you!

No, the wine's not for Santa... ;)

Santa did well!

Reindeer made a little bit of a mess!

In their matching PJs they they opened the night before... finally a picture with all three!

I like this one... is it too late to send out Christmas cards?

Not quite yet ready to let them into the living room!

I hope you all had a very Merry Christmas as well! XOXO

Merry Christmas!

One of the most glorious messes in the world is the mess created in
the living room on Christmas day.  Don't clean it up too quickly.
~Andy Rooney

Wishing you all the Merriest of Christmases!

It's begining to look a lot like Christmas...

Christmas waves a magic wand over this world, and behold,
everything is softer and more beautiful.
~Norman Vincent Peale

Santa's treats are just about ready to come out of the oven... I think he'll just go wild over our eggnog pound cake and we created some decadent fudge brownies with hidden pieces of Junior Mints and After Eight Mints melted over the top, spread thin with a spatula to create a thin chocolate mint layer. These brownies are super decadently rich and a perfect treat for Santa before Mrs. Claus puts him on a diet tomorrow! I need to remember the reindeer's snacks before it's too late...


There's a fire burning brightly... We're watching Elf and there's a glass of Pinot Noir to my left. Daddy is off picking up the pizza that the children will be allowed to eat in front of the fire tonight and they'll unwrap one present each, their Christmas pajamas...


Usually we have much left to do. This year we can kick up our feet and relax.


I wish you all a wonderful and Merry Christmas Eve!

Pay it Forward...

As I was catching up on my blogroll this morning I stopped off at Brunch at Saks. I simply adore her blog. It's pure eye-candy. Her most recent post really touched me. I always try to be kind to people and go out of my way to make people feel comfortable and special ... I go out of my way to thank everyone who has helped me in one way or another over the course of my day. It's the gracious thing to do. It's the right thing to do. As my children grow up it's something important for me to instill in them. It's more than manners and upbringing -- it's about respect.  I want my children to respect everyone they meet. Rich, poor, old and young; everyone deserves to be respected and there is a lack of such these days. I want my children to learn and understand that there is no difference between them, or me, and the person bagging their groceries. We don't know why that person is bagging groceries. Perhaps they fell on to hard times. Well, that person bagging groceries could be them, or me one day. We have no idea what the future has in store.

And with that in mind I wish to share her Pay it Forward post. After all, we can all use a little help from our friends, and we can always do something to help our friends... or strangers. I have been the fortunate recipient of so many wonderful people over the course of the past year.  When I had surgery last spring friends brought food and cared for my children and drove me around for three weeks -- to the doctor's, to the grocery store, to physical therapy.They gave me support and encouragement. Somewhere someone needs you. Somewhere someone needs me.

Some ideas to Pay it Forward:

* Pay someone a compliment...
* Do what you can to make people feel good about themselves... this is priceless!
* Offer to watch a new mother's young child so that she can take a break and get a shower, some rest or out of the house.
* Bake some cookies for a dear friend (or friends) and leave them in their mailbox with a note.
* Buy the person behind you in line at Starbucks their coffee
* Donate non perishables to your local food shelter. (Especially during the non-holiday season when they tend to get overlooked.)
* Do some volunteer work or community service by helping at a local shelter, farm, or business.
* Donate old clothes and household items (gently used) to a local woman's shelter.
* Teach your children about paying it forward by having them donate their used toys.
* Pay someone's toll or transportation fare.
* Take a friend out to dinner.
* Bring dinner over to a friend in need.
* Buy some groceries or pick up a gift card for a friend who may be having hard financial times.
* Pick up an iTunes card for a friend who needs a pick-me-up... so they can have some happy songs or
* Make a "mixed tape" on a CD of fun and inspirational songs for a friend going though tough times.

I would love to hear some of your ideas as to how you would pay it forward!

JmcLaughlin + New York Social Diary + Me!

This was brought to my attention yesterday by a reader and Facebook friend.  I think the photographer liked me... there are several pictures of me!  Andrew, my "cabana boy" (as mentioned in my first Jmac article) is standing right behind me. As you can tell we are a fun lot! Scroll down and you'll see me standing with my taller and darker "twin" and Sam is sticking out her tongue... They were the two I first saw the day when I wandered in and ended up asking about a part time job. Sam is the one who hired me after looking me up and down! Oh, and, Wendy, my first "fan" to publicly recognize me is in a photo with her adorable husband, Jay McLaughlin and Steven Siegler, President and CEO of J.mcLaughlin.

For more pictures of me, er, I mean the store and the event ;) visit New York Social Diary's site.

Wasn't that fun?!

(Also, if you are a regular reader, or a friend, please take a look at the post below!)

The best gift of all...

The best gift of all doesn't come from a store, or the mail and it cannot be purchased. The best gift of all is one that keeps on giving... It has no expiration date. It requires no buttons or batteries or strings. It's there when you need it, throughout the year; morning, noon and night. It's a powerful gift. It's a simple gift. It's understated. It's the most meaningful gift around. The best gift of all doesn't have to be given on any particular day. It needs no fancy wrapping or ribbon. The best gift of all won't break the bank. In fact, it is free. The best gift of all comes from the heart. For, the best gift of all is the gift of friendship.

 

all images via Pinterest

This is a hard holiday season for me. I have had to put up a front, and be happy and merry for the children. For Christmas to them is magical and I cannot take that away from them and I cannot deny them the wonder and splendor of the season and the day. But for reasons I cannot mention at the moment, it is a hard season for me this year. Much of me wants to rush through it -- to hurry it up and have it be over. I would if I could. I would crawl into my bed and pull the covers over my head and emerge into the New Year. This would be my preference. But I have children who wonder and marvel at the magic of the holiday and so I put on a happy face for them and we play Christmas songs and we bake and we decorate the mantel and the tree (even citrus tree in the kitchen!) and we talk about their wishes and what they think Santa will bring them. The Elph is moved every night -- Oh damn...  forgot again! We read books and sing carols and watch movies on TV. We drink egg nog and put candy canes in hot chocolate. The children are excited and eager. I'm just trudging along.

I'd love to shower all my friends with beautifully wrapped gifts this year. But I cannot. The best I can do is thank them for their amazing friendships and support, and in return I can be their friend... tireless, true, unconditional and supportive as they have been for me. Because, it is true, when all else ceases to exist friends remain, tried, true and strong... and always there.

I am so very fortunate to be the recipient of many, many wonderful friends. I have many I can call or email any day or night. I have many close by and some not so close. I have many whom I do not see on a regular basis, though I know, without hesitation, that they would do anything for me... just knowing this...  I am eternally grateful. And now, thanks to the internet and the new worlds of Twitter and blogging, I find myself with even more wonderful friends... You all know who you are... and whether we have met in person or not, the gift of friendship has not been diminished. I am forever grateful that somehow we have ended up in one another's lives...

As many of you now know, a month or so ago my car veered off the road into a parking lot. A new store had re-opened in town after being gone for about three years. I wandered in. This was not my plan. The store was breath-takingly gorgeous and without thought or hesitation I found myself inquiring about some part time help. This was not my plan. (Me of the "I could never work in retail" mentality!) And the next thing I know I've been hired and had a job. This was not my plan. But an amazing thing happened. I was put in a beautiful space with beautiful, warm, friendly and very funny people. And even though I have only known them for a month or so, I am proud to consider each and every one of them my friend. It is amazing, how in a very short period of time, friendships are cultivated. I'm not sure what steered my car off the road and into the parking lot that day, but I am awfully glad it did.

And so I thank you all for your amazing and kind friendships and please know, that not only am I ever so grateful, but you have my gift -- my simple, unwrapped, but amazing gift -- in return.